Thursday, May 25, 2017
WARNING: CAT MAY BEHAVE...LIKE A CAT
I spent the last two days in training about product liability.
In its most fundamental, pure conception, product liability is meant to ensure that people who make things make them:
1) as safe as possible
2) consistently in that safe way, and
3) warn a user of any dangers that exist even when said product is as safe as can be.
It sounds deceptively simple. I was sitting there listening to detailed outlines as to product exposures common to specific industries and court cases where dumbassery (pardon my French!) was not only excused, but rewarded,
and got to thinking: what if we had to do this with everything? Like weather, or basic bodily functions (teeheehee), or....pets.
And this is what happened.
So, yeah, it may be hard to hold Mama cats liable for their "products." Not only is English not their native language, but also, the just don't give a damn. At all. In lieu of an opposable thumb, they've figured out how to flip us off with their eyes. And if you think you're going to get a dime out of a cat, just try collecting your own hairbands that they've stolen and then hidden in some pocket of the universe that doesn't exist in the normal space-time continuum.
But beyond that, after trying unsuccessfully for
two Halloweens in a row to get Jellybean to wear his adorbs little fireman costume, and Nilly her
precious lion mane, I don't think there's a breakable's-chance-on-an-elevated-surface that the warning labels are going to last the lifetime of the product.
I have no concrete solutions to either the challenges of cat liability, or the challenges of product liability. But I propose that we make May 25 National
Manufacturer's Day. Hug someone who makes something!
And maybe get them a cat.